A bittersweet romance...

My affair with England has been, shall we say, rocky for the past few weeks. It's been difficult. I swore when I came that I wasn't coming specifically for him but our love was always part of it. Perhaps distance makes the heart grow fonder, as they say. We were so good together with me there and him here. Now, together, we just get on each others' nerves. Night after night, I go to bed and we just turn our backs to one another; better to just let the fight wait until morning. Of course we have our good days also. This weekend for example, we didn't really fight that much. We even sort of reveled in each other. Under gorgeous skies, we strolled hand-in-hand through the streets of the city. Together, we took in the Tower of London and shared a Vietnamese dinner on a sidewalk in Hammersmith. Then, the week starts, as it always does, and once again, we're plunged into angst and anger with one another. I don't think it's something I've done. I think that this whole time, he was hiding his true nature from me. He is, in turns, supremely inefficient, beguilingly witty, quick-tempered, and charmingly beautiful. Perhaps there were stars in my eyes as I prepared to come here and be with him, perhaps they shielded his (extremely) annoying bits. I know that we'll be okay in the long run but right now, times is tough. We've talked it over a bit, or rather, we've yelled about it ad nauseum, and, at the moment we've made a decision; when I'm more financially secure, I'm going to begin seeing other countries. He also, will be entertaining more bright-eyed and intrepid young Americans. I think the occasional separation will be good for both of us. For the moment, it's good that I have the job. At least there, I escape that long-faced, tired (and tiring) stare. Also, I'm going to try to focus on his good points, for the sake of my sanity. I think that, in time, we'll be able to smile again and embrace as we once did. I hope that day will come soon but, at the moment, it seems so far away.